Hollywood Hypocrites and Their Old Pal, Al "Chubbycakes" Gore

Mar 1 2007

I've been thinking about blogging on this important issue for some time now, but Al "Double Cheeseburger" Gore's recent stunt at the Academy Awards propelled me to write post-haste.

Despite their general lack of education, most Hollywood celebrities have the audacity to think that the general populace (generally more educated) should be required to endure their incessant bloviating about foreign issues, the economy, and most hypocritically, the environment and global warming.

ONE
Without any knowledge of what kind of tax rates and economic policies stimulate and grow the economy (and certainly without knowledge of the Laffer curve), Hollywood adopts a moronic Robin Hood type view of the economy where people who are in the upper brackets of income earning should be required to redistribute a humongous share so it can be wasted within the government instead of building the economy with investment in small businesses and buying goods and services (which grows the economy and creates jobs for the poor). You know, Hollywood's love for those kind of Pelosi-esque policies where money oozes into the federal bureaucracy so it can either inefficiently be wasted with ridiculous government programs or redistributed to people who don't want to work, giving them less incentive to do so and more time to commit crime.

Hollywood would be surely be content with a 70% tax rate on the upper class. Heaven forbid anyone should be allowed to have a million dollar house and a couple of BMW's to reward their hard work, superb IQ capacity, and innovation. What does Leonardo DiCaprio care of a 70% annual tax rate on salary when he still would have money left over for a house in West Palm, Malibu, and The Hamptons, not to mention 50 leather bound Priuses and Gisele's daily meal of Campbell's soup. Is it too much to ask that the $250K income earner have a jet ski, a bi-decennial trip to Tuscany, one house in Los Angeles, and perhaps half a can of Campbell's soup?

TWO
If Iran were about aim a missle at American soil, and heaven forbid we wanted to do something about it, Hollywood would immediately decry the government for "attacking Iran" and promptly "demand an end our imperalist behavior". Hollywood's feminist view of foreign policy is simply that war is bad, and we should gayly release a bird, demand peace, form a hippy happy circle, and "talk it out". Yeah - try telling that to Mahmoud Ahmadimejad. I'm sure he'll stop enriching uranium over a nice afternoon tea witk Kofi Annan. Oh, but Kofi Annan asked nicely.

Kofi: "Mahmoud, I FEEL that it would nice if you stopped enriching uranium."

Mahmoud: "Sure, sure. *Cough*. I'll shut down my plants Kofi, just for you. You have my word sugarcake."

Yeah, right.

There's a part of the world (ala North Korea and the Middle East) that foolishly demands to play with the big-boys and won't be persuaded with the UN and Europe's unwholesome brand of liberal sugarcakeing. If I were Mahmoud, I'd go into Iraq immediately after a US retreat and dominate the oil market, effectively doubling my power and potentially crippling the US economy. Oh, and the UN has passed a resolution. How sweet! Maybe sugarcake Kofi will invite me over to a lovely brunch where he can give me a femmy slap on the wrist and tell me how bad I've been. I'm shakin' in my turban.

THREE
Al Gore really has his balls...and the only place his balls should be is in an "ironclad lockbox" (a cute little election 2000 reference if you picked up on that). And don't give me this attack the messenger thing, because the messenger is a total hypocrite and has severe credibility problems.

To tell you the truth, I don't want to hear about sustainability from a man who can't even sustain himself. Al Gore's as fat as a bloated elephant, and he looks like he's going to run out of breath and die at every one of his global warming conferences. What's his point in saving the earth if he's two fried chicken wings away from his grave?

Who the hell does Al Gore think we are? Al Gore demands that the minions begin consuming less energy per person, have housing & livability growth on a more sustainable footprint, drive those painfully ugly and overpriced Priuses, and bust our booming industrial economy so the temperate won't go up 3 degrees in the next 100 years (to only which a fraction is can be attributed to US behavior, and even a fraction more that's not natural causes).

Meanwhile, Mr. Holier Than Thou can sail around to his self-flagellating global warming conferences with entourage on multiple private Gulfstream jets, own multiple houses which severely damage the sustainable environmental footprint, consume 20 times the energy in his households that the average family consumes, and ruin a healthy industrial economy and become globally less competitive by placing margin busting governmental restrictions on how businesses can operate "greenly". Meanwhile, China and India are roaring along, surpassing us (which they seem to be doing already) with real free market efficiencies and laughing at us the whole way for giving in to Al Gore and his entourage of Greenpeace nutcases. And with China's booming size and horrible environmental record, our footprint in the global warming problem is going to become even more negligible.

Al Gore is going to criticize me for driving my four family members around in a suburban and owning a house that's a little bigger than what I need while he and other celebrities have the balls to troll around in private jets and 30,000 square foot energy sucking Mansions in the Hamptons and Malibu? I don't think so.

Justin L.

For Future Reference on this topic:
South Park 10.2: Smug Alert
South Park 10.5: Manbearpig
South Park ?---?: Rob Reiner and Smoking