You Guys Should Wait A Few Months Before Slobbering All Over Obama

Mar 18 2007

It's almost like y'all are Michael Jackson and Barack Obama is Macaulay Culkin. It's kind of gross.

In order to be reasonable here, I'm going to make a concession. It's going to hurt.

Ouch! My Republican friends are going to have my neck, but I don't really mind Bill Clinton. It's not really chic in Republican circles to admit this, but I will because I believe in saying what's right and not towing the party line, especially if it's wrong. His economic policies weren't half bad, he broke with the left in the Welfare Reform Act, and did a few other good things as well as a few bad things. God knows he and Hillary are corrupt, but I can live with that - I'm Latin/Spanish for God sakes, and if there's anything we know about, it's corruption (just take a trip down to see Hugo). And I think the "horny hick" idea is kind of cool (however I think his impeachment was quite appropriate, and his behavior unbecoming for a head of state). This is of course not to say that George Bush Sr. or Bob Dole wouldn't have done a better job. I'm just saying Clinton is a decent compromise if things don't go your way, unlike Nancy "San Francisco Values" Pelosi.

So here's my point: it seems to be chic right now to salivate over Barack Obama as president in much the same way my dog Buddy finds it chic to salivate over my leg. However, none of us really know where he stands or really know where Billary, uh oops, I mean Hillary stands. There's not much talk of policy in Obama's grandiose sweeping diatribes of civil rights and uniting America. Obama's actual record, despite being shorter than Kim Jong-Il's "nuclear love/pepe weapon", is very left-leaning, and those with agendas on the staunch left or right don't have good records in uniting America.

So before you sloppily throw your support behind one candidate or the other, give things a chance to play out. I don't mind if anyone throws their support behind Obama as long as you've given yourself ample time for review and introspection of Obama and other candidates.

Admittedly, I think I've been too early to throw my support behind Giuliani and haven't given myself adequate time to explore Romney. However, I do know where Giuliani stands on most issues, which are made clear by his recent statements and consistent record. His moderate vibe is also very appealing, and I do think his idea of gun-control being a states' rights issue is a nice compromise. My strong family history from New York also makes him personally attractive. And I don't like Romney's flip-flopping. It reeks of John Kerry (equals Phil Angelides, equals gross). McCain is tired, and he wants to repeal tax cuts. That just took me over the edge.

Anyways, I gave Billy a chance, and I think y'all on the left and especially moderates should give Giuliani and perhaps Hillary a look over. This does not apply to John Edwards however. John Edwards = Phil Angelides = real big douche bag. Ironically, I think John Edwards will be at his "Orange County" ranch for quite a long time, and his adding of Kate Michelman as a campaign advisor and Amanda Marcotte as horrifically vulgar blogger have already more than sealed the deal.